Lee Swords Fishing

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March Blog…part whatever…Its my birthday so I don’t give a shite!

Welcome to the “March Blog…part whatever”



Tomorrow is my birthday!  So the details of things can go by the wayside…I am not really that bothered…So, what’s new? Apart from me being a miserable old geezer like Clint Eastwood in Gran Torino?

Well, I have a new camera for a start, a Canon 600D!!! And it shoots video!! And Tina has already said “No” so that is out of the question…even if I did think it was a good idea at the time. So how did the river season end for me? Two words….F*cking w*nk! Two more…Complete sh*te!!

Always make the most of your time fishing...I would never have thought this would be my last barbel of the 2012-13 season

I could go on, A combination of bad weather and  ill health meant that I caught nothing all week, mostly because I didn’t go fishing because I was too poorly to muster the strength to get myself off my death bed and into the car whereby Tina was going to drop me off on the Trent for a two night job.I can't go fishing...I am not very well!

I have to be honest I reckon it would have killed me.

Oh well, there is always next week! Oh….No there isn’t always next week is there? No that’s right we have just moved into the “Mundella Quarter” which fits in nice with the “Fucked Up Flood Quarter” the ” Half Inch of Snow Gridlocked Roads and Motorways End of the Fucking World Buy All the Fucking Bread, Tea and Sugar in ASDA Quarter” and my favourite three months of the year, the  ” Let’s Go Fishing and Look at all the Shit the Fair Weather Wankers have left behind them Quarter”

Seriously!! What the fuck is it all about????

the Mundella Act of 1878 is irrelevant to the modern fishing scene and serves no purpose whatsoever..WHATSOEVER!! NONE!!!

Does anyone actually think that the “Closed Season/ Mundella Quarter” with prevent Mr. Crabtrovski and his faithful companion Petre from going out and enjoying a bit of sport?Out of season fishing

Will it arse-hole  They will be having a right laugh about now…all the best pegs to go at and no fucker to stop them…because everyone else is playing by the book!

The chances of getting caught on the river bank are slim to zilch because there simply isn’t the man power to bailiff the vast stretches of water involved .

So the probability the offenders will have their gear rammed up their arse is next to none.Mr Crabtrovski

The chances of getting caught must be slim if we even have the likes of Bob James chancing his arm on the River Wye out of season.

And people worry about the damage that Otters cause! When compared to a pack of Eastern Europeans with nets an Otter is the least of our worries!

They can clear out complete stretches in no time at all leaving nothing of worth in their wake…but to say anything other than ” Well there seem to be some cultural Eastern European Match anglerdivergences to clear up” is to have yourself labeled as a rabid right-wing fascist neo-nazi racist.

But the scariest thing is…Anglers on the riverbank are the least of our worries!!

What do you think unscrupulous waste disposal people will be up to when all the people have drifted away from the rivers edge?

I will tel you what they will be doing they will be fly-tipping and dumping their shit like bastards!

Fly tipping on the Trent

And they will be very confident of getting away with it as well because there will be nobody down the river to keep a eye out for them.

And it won’t just be a bit of insulation that has had the copper stripped out of it…what about chemical waste or even waste oil?

Not every restaurant has a contract with a waste oil disposal company…nope some just chuck it down the drain…or straight into the river, where it does massive amounts of damage!Dumping chemicals

And oil is probably the least noxious substance that could be dumped whilst the watchful eyes of the angler are forced away.






Google deleted their YouTube channel without warning and with it went their entire history…some kids would whine and mope around…Not Carl and Alex!

Nope they got straight back up and started again…Well done boys keep up the good work!! The stats are a good thing but your reputation is not built on numbers.



Tim Ridge BARBEL Rigs!!!


I went to see my mates Tim Ridge and Dave Tipping give a talk at the Barbel Society regional do at Weatherby a couple of weeks back, and rather good it was too. Whilst I was there Tim showed me the prototypes of his his new line in barbel rigs…

Now this is where it gets tricky for me because even though I will happily hold my hands up and say that his Tench and Bream rigs are better than mine by a country mile and that there is very little point in me wasting my time trying to tie them myself because what with the cost of bits plus the lack of movement and feeling in the tips of my heavily butchered fingers, the whole point would be a worthless operation in time wasting.

It does however pain me to say that his barbel rigs look better than mine as well…

The mag-aligner looks like the dogs bollocks and when they do come online I suggest that everyone that wants to give themselves a bit of an edge get onto his site and buy themselves some…because come the new season “edges” will be all important!

However let’s not get too far in front of ourselves…it is March 19th as i type this and the Bream and Tench are just thinking about waking up from along winter of torpor…and when they do they will be on it and they will be on it big time!!

So do what I am going to do…get yourself on Tim Ridges Tench and Bream Rigs!!!

Tim Ridge



One Response to “March Blog…part whatever…Its my birthday so I don’t give a shite!”

  1. Some very salient points made in a very entertaining manner Lee, as always. The issue of poaching makes most of our blood boil and I can see only one solution – stop the close season.

    Anyway great blog as usual, thanks.

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